Nobody Cares. Work Harder!

You got a promotion at work?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You got fired at work?
Nobody cares. Worker harder!

You lost 50 pounds?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You gained 50 pounds?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You couldn’t finish the marathon?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You won the marathon?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You got married?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You got divorced?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You have 100,000 followers on Instagram?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

You have zero followers on Instagram?
Nobody cares. Work harder!

Nobody really cares about your goals.

Nobody cares about your excuses for not achieving what you said you would or what you thought you deserved.

Recent success? Today means nothing.
Recent failure? Today means nothing.

Yesterday means NOTHING.
Give all you have to today.
Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.

What you’ve accomplished in the past means nothing. Time to work harder!

– Lessons from “Endure: How to Work Hard, Outlast, and Keep Hammering” by Cameron Hanes.

Key Lessons Learned

Do you ever find yourself constantly worrying about what others think of you? Do you lose sleep over the fear of being judged or criticized?

For many years, I have been living with social anxiety. I was so self-conscious that I constantly worried about how people would judge me. I thought if I did anything wrong or said anything stupid, everyone would criticize me and disdain me. I was so afraid of being judged that I would do anything to avoid the spotlight.

But the truth is the spotlight I believe is shining on me isn’t nearly as bright as I think.

It’s a common experience known as the spotlight effect. This phenomenon refers to our tendency to believe that others are paying more attention to us than they actually are. We often mistakenly assume that we are constantly under scrutiny, but the truth is that people are far more preoccupied with their own lives and concerns.

The spotlight effect plays a significant role in fueling overthinking. When we overthink, we become trapped in a cycle of negative thoughts and self-doubt, making it difficult to trust our own judgment and stifling our ability to take risks.

We all experience the spotlight effect to some degree. We all have moments of self-consciousness and worry about how others perceive us. However, if we want to take charge of our lives, to take control of our own destinies regardless of what other people say or do, we must focus on what really matters in our lives.

Simply put, we need to stop giving a fuck about things and people that ain’t matter.

Mark Manson, the author of “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck”, nails it with this advice, “In life, we have a limited amount of fucks to give. So you must choose your fucks wisely. If you go around giving a fuck about everything and everyone without conscious thought or choice—well, then you’re going to get fucked.”

Biased To Action, Not Feeling

So, how can we stop overthinking about things that ain’t matter?

One of the most important lessons I have learned to overcome overthinking is disconnecting action from feeling.

We are not held back in life because we are incapable of taking action or making change. We are held back because we don’t feel like or are afraid of taking action or making change. So we don’t.

The truth is that you can have a version of what you want and simply not feel like taking the action required to pursue that path because you let your feelings and emotions hijack your body and mind.

To rise up to meet the best version of our lives, to reach our full potential, we must overcome our discomfort and emotional resistance.

We must biased to action, not feeling.

Here are some other tips that have helped me to overcome overthinking:

– Challenge your negative thoughts. When you catch yourself thinking something negative, ask yourself if it’s true, if it’s helpful, and if it’s based on evidence. Often, you’ll find that your negative thoughts are irrational, unhelpful, and temporary.

– Focus on the present. When you overthink, you’re usually worrying about the past or the future. But the past is gone and the future is uncertain. The only thing you can control is the present moment. Try to focus on what you’re doing right now by practicing meditation regularly, and enjoy the process rather than the outcome.

– Practice gratitude. Overthinking often makes us focus on what we lack or what we fear. But there are many things in our lives that we can be grateful for, such as our health, our family, our friends, our hobbies, etc. Try to make a habit of writing a Gratitude Journal – write down three things you’re grateful for every day, and notice how your mood improves.

– Talk to someone. Sometimes, overthinking can make us feel isolated and alone. But we don’t have to deal with everything by ourselves. Talking to someone we trust can help us gain a different perspective, vent our emotions, and get some support and advice.

– Exercise & do something fun. Overthinking can drain our energy and make us feel stressed and unhappy. But doing exercise, such as running, hiking, swimming, or whatever physical activities you enjoy, can help us relax, distract ourselves from our worries, and boost our energy and mood. If you’re not a sporty person, you can also find something that makes you happy, whether it’s reading a book, watching a movie, playing a game, listening to music, etc., and do it regularly.